Practicing Acceptance in Personal Growth

I had a great conversation with a friend via Facebook chat the other day, and thought I'd cut and paste the highlights for you all :)

The question was raised: how do I know the difference between giving myself grace and indulging my struggles? How can I tell what I should be praying for? What does God want me to work on?

I shared that one of the keys is to practice self-acceptance.

Practicing acceptance is about accepting where and who you are today and at the same time, trusting that God cares about your personal growth. I believe we are called to practice acceptance not only of our circumstances, but of our limitations and strengths. Practicing acceptance is about trusting in the Creator and whom He made you to be, and trusting that He is also the Potter and is in the process of molding us.

I always love to share this: If you are a believer in and a follower of Jesus, You & God are friends. I said to my friend, just like in our friendship, if he offends me, or even if I see that there's an area in him where he could use some growth, I would tell him.
So will God! And He's even more emotionally healthy than I am ;) So if we're in communion with Him, we don't need to go on a fishing expedition to figure out what needs to be changed. He will reveal it to us.

He is also our Father, and a good, healthy Father disciplines His kids with gentleness, not punishment. The goal of discipline is growth, not shame, and definitely not condemnation. God will gently reveal to us, with His still small voice, the areas that could use some work. As I shared above, we don't want to go fishing in areas that God isn't calling us to fish in. Instead of making a to-do list of "Areas I need to be aware of" (though it's not bad to be aware of them), we are to allow God to show us those issues when He wants to.

Our prayer should then be, "God, I trust You, as my Father and as my friend, to continue to work in me. I trust that You will reveal to me, whether in prayer or as I go about my daily life, what I need to be aware of and what needs work. I open my heart to Your discipline and Your still small voice."

Regional Conference Update

What an amazing conference we had this past weekend! Union Center Christian Church could not have been more warm and welcoming. They had an amazing crew of volunteers (140+), a truly talented music team for me to work with (you guys rock!), and a great turn-out (as of Friday night, including walk-ins, 215+ were registered for the conference). And Joe Dallas was encouraging and challenging as usual. My testimony was well-received, and I got a ton of great feedback about the songs I shared.

One of my favorite things about Exodus conferences is reconnecting with old friends! You know who you are :)

For those of you who are looking for the lyrics to the songs I wrote, here they are, including one recording (I hope to have the other 2 up soon - will let you know when they are posted). If it's easier to just download the chord sheets as a document, I have some of my worship songs posted here. They are free for your use, but please do give me credit, as they are protected by copyright.

And here is an iPhone picture from the rear lobby, where my husband Roy was sitting with the baby, and the words of my song on the big screen. Fun to see :)

Exodus North Atlantic Regional Conference This Weekend!

If you follow my posts on the Exodus International Blog, you know that the Exodus North Atlantic Regional Conference is this weekend! In fact, my family & I will leave tomorrow to attend an evening music rehearsal. Pray for us! My kids don't always love the car :) I'll be leading the music, as well as sharing a re-worked version of my testimony, entitled "What's in a name?" I'm quite excited. I'll definitely share the testimony either here or over at the Exodus International Blog - I'll let you know :)

Hope to see you there!

Peace

I got the best compliment yesterday. I bumped into an old friend at a ministry event. We got to chatting, and he said I seem "at peace with life." He definitely got me thinking.

Peace, like so much else, is really a choice. I have a choice in how I allow myself to respond to the chaos and challenges I face every day. The Bible has quite a few references to eagles, and in particular God raising us up on eagles' wings. I recently learned that during storms, an eagle can be found soaring above the clouds, totally unaffected and almost unaware of the storm raging below them.

That's what I want to experience. When the storms come, I want to know that I know that God is in control. Just as Jesus rebuked the waves and the wind in Matthew 8, I can choose to trust that God is Lord over the storms in my life. He may not have caused them, but He has power and dominion over them.

So yes, I do feel very content, peaceful, joyful - even happy lots of the time. It's been a long road to get to this place! I can only pray that 10 years down the road, I have even more moments of peace in my life.

National Eating Disorder Awareness Week - My Story

It's National Eating Disorder Awareness Week. Read my story of overcoming an eating disorder.

It began oh so slowly and I tried to ignore
That I was so caught up in it
But I realized so quickly like never before
That I couldn't escape from it

Article: "When The Darkness Closes In"

I was really touched and challenged by the following article written by Mike Ensley, a friend of mine who also write for Boundless, called "When The Darkness Closes In".

The title of the article is a line from the Matt Redman son, "Blessed Be Your Name". I have a love/hate relationship with this song. Don't get me wrong; it's an amazing song. But it's also a challenging one, and since the miscarriage, I cannot sing it without breaking into tears. The Scripture that much of the song is based on is the one that was running through my head as I waited to find out if I was really having a miscarriage. It is Job's words that he said after being informed he had lost almost everything, included all of his children: "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I shall return there. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away. Blessed be the name of the LORD."

The article is about many things, including depression - something I've struggled with on & off for my whole life. You should really go read it. Here's a quote.

Depression affects people in unique ways. In times when I'm hit by something much more potent than "the blues," it manifests in a sort of social anxiety. I'll get claustrophobic in a place like a movie theater, a mall — or church. There's no real reason, no specific dread that occupies my mind; only the same emotion as if there were. I crave nothing but quiet and solitude. The experience is hard to describe, other than to say it can be very uncomfortable and even disheartening.

Boston Exodus Training and the Protestors

Earlier this week, Alive in Christ (the ministry I direct), Park Street Church (the church that hosts the ministry) and Exodus International (the organization of which Alive in Christ is a member) hosted a Boston training event for pastors, ministry leaders, seminary students, educators, and counselors on how to respond to the issue of homosexuality with biblical truth and compassion.

We knew there was a protest scheduled during the day, with well-known speakers and gay activists attending, such as Wayne Besen and Arlene Isaacson. We had several protesters come to the meeting and stand up in the middle of speaking sessions to "demonstrate"; I'll spare you the details :)

One side of the room we were meeting in is completely covered in windows. Outside the windows is a historic cemetery that tourists walk through. A group of probably 20-30 protesters came up to the windows to scream loudly at us through a bullhorn and try and take pictures of the attendees. They shouted some mantras, such as "Exodus, Exodus, Quack, Quack, Quack! You can't change gays; that's a fact!" and "Ex-gay, no way! Don't believe a word they say!" It's fairly clear from those two statements that they really have no idea what we were talking about in the training or the even the mission of Exodus. That is even more clear if you watch some of the footage of the continued protest and the words of the speakers.

As I was thinking about the anti-Exodus protesters leading up to the conference, I realized they are sort of missing the point. The problem in their minds is Exodus; if they could shut Exodus down somehow, the problem is solved. But Exodus didn't form for the sake of Exodus; Exodus was created because people all over the United States were seeking out this type of ministry. People were not satisfied with the label of "born gay" that was slapped on them.

The protesters need to realize that shutting down Exodus will not change the need - the need in people's heart for a different answer, for a different life. They may not experience that need, but that will not change the fact that thousands of others, like myself, desired to be obedient to what we saw in God's Word and what we felt He was calling us to do. And when we were willing to surrender that area of our lives to God, when we were willing to do whatever it would take to walk in obedience to Him, what He gave us in return was far better than anything we could ever have imagined.